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The Demon

Let me tell you a tale of a terrible force,
Of my late night run-in with Demon Charlie, the Horse,
And the terror that coursed through my every leg vein,
In excruciating, thundering, terrible pain.

I was lying in bed, with dreams gently brewing,
Not minding what anything around me was doing,
I’d just kissed my wife, and wished her good night,
When came the most horrible, God-awful fright.

My leg seized a-sudden with dreadful death grip,
And paralysis set from my toe to my hip,
A knotting and twisting in the back of my calf,
I couldn’t move, but that wasn’t the half.

I let out a yelp, so my wife came awake,
She asked me, “What’s wrong? What sense can you make?”
I replied through gritting and clenched teeth and jaw,
“It’s the Demon Horse Charlie, and he’s killing me. AAAAAHHHHHH!”
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“But I can’t! Chuck Dog’s got me with all of his fury!”

To guard you against this great demon’s attack,
I’ll describe how you’d notice him and send him back,
He comes from a hell where they take pride in the fact,
They can torture man’s muscles with no sense of tact,
His long jet-black mane runs the length of his height,
And his blackness is camouflage in the night,
He’s most likely to sneak when you’ve worked or run hard,
And your muscles are weary and you’ve let down your guard,
He sneaks up the cover and up through your jammies,
And seizes your calf, or your thigh, or your hammies.

I warn you, beware Demon Charlie and pray,
That you don’t end up as I did, the end of that day,
Crippled and crumpled, the Charlie Horse debtor,
But, ten minutes later you’ll prob’ly be all better.

5 replies on “The Demon”

I feel your pain… the only reason that I woke up in the middle of the night during pregnancy… the best fix… stand on cold tile, I don’t know why it works, but it does.

hi-larious. cubby got a charlie horse playing basketball last week and he could barely walk for, like, 4 days!